Mom's Stroke

December 12, 2012
3435 Fox Run Road Apartment 333
Sarasota, FL 34231

6:00AM in Mom's apartment.

Mom is on the Neuro Ward at Sarasota Memorial Hospital. She has been in the hospital since suffering a stroke after walking on the beach on August 1, 2012. She had just finished walking her favorite walk at about 9:00AM. She was putting her beach chair in the back of her car when she collapsed. A bystander called 911. EMS arrived and was unable to bring Mom back to consciousness. She was taken to the hospital where she was evaluated with a CT scan of the brain. While in the Radiology Department in the hospital she vomited and had to be intubated and a nasal-gastric tube was placed in her stomach to drain gastric contents and acidic secretions thereby protecting her airway.

Phone calls were made to Lakehouse West (Mom's Residence of 4 years) and contact information was given to Janice and myself. I was in Key West with Sandy and Danielle completing a triathlon when I received the message. We took the ferry that afternoon back to Fort Myers, quickly stopped at home to pick up some clothes and drove up to Sarasota. We reached the Intensive Care Unit at around midnight.

The very competent ICU nurse took a history from Sandy and I. Mom had been in the hospital two months ago with intestinal issues and we were never able to come up with a definitive diagnosis in spite of numerous tests, scans and consults. After discharge two months ago Mom had done well and was able to resume her walks and other normal activities including a plane trip to Pittsburgh to visit Janice and her family for Janice's birthday in October.

I was shown the report of the initial CT scan which showed blockage of the left middle cerebral artery. Mom was sedated on a propothal drip. A respirator was ventilating her through her endotracheal tube. This hospital admission was unlike anything that had ever happened to Mom before.

The nurse enquired whether Mom had a living will or had given advanced directives or had designated a health care surrogate. Mom had taken care of this years ago and I was confident that we could get her documents from her attorney when his office opened on Monday morning. As health care surrogate I told the hospital's representatives that should there be little or no hope of regaining back the quality of life that Mom had been accustomed to, it was Mom's wish that life sustaining interventions... ie tubes, ventilators, iv's, feeding tubes be withheld.

The following day a follow up CT scan of the brain revealed that there had been massive injury to two separate portions of Mom's left brain. Apparently there had been blockage of the left middle cerebral artery proximal to where the posterior cerebral artery originates. This so called persistent fetal anatomy resulted in a cut off of blood flow to not only the motor strip of Mom's cerebrum but also the speech center as well.
In addition the massive injury resulted in swelling which distorted the brain anatomy by expanding the left side and pushing the brain's midline structures to the right side. Consulting neurologists agreed that even with intensive therapy in the best case there was little hope of Mom any semblance of normal function.

I spoke with Janice who was returning to Pittsburgh from a swim meet with her family in Cleveland, OH. We both agreed that Mom would not wish to have her life prolonged artificially and that Janice should join Sandy and I in Sarasota to carry out Mom's wishes.

While in route to the Sarasota Memorial Hospital from Key West Florida I contacted a old family friend, a Dr. Ted Probst. Ted was visiting one of his daughters in New Paltz,
New York when I called. He suggested the names of two neurologists for us to consult.
Dr. Sutherland was assigned to Mom's case. Dr. Sutherland reviewed Mom's CT Scans and agreed that the prognosis was poor for return to the life that Mom was accustomed to live.

Stuart

Mom's Stroke

Mom's Stroke

Fwd: Thinking of you and Stu

Sent From Stuart

Begin forwarded message:

From: Janice <mirra7@comcast.net>
Date: December 6, 2012, 10:47:58 AM EST
To: Stuart levy <bigstu52@gmail.com>, Donald Jortner <jortner2@cox.net>
Subject: Fwd: Thinking of you and Stu

Thought you would like this one from Josh's wedding.   My mother-in-law sent it this morning.

Sent from my iPad

Begin forwarded message:

From: Sue <sue.mirra@gmail.com>
Date: December 6, 2012, 6:24:02 AM EST
To: Janice Mirra <mirra7@comcast.net>
Subject: Thinking of you and Stu

Sent from my iPad

Why I Wake Early -- Mary Oliver

http://www.panhala.net/archive/why_i_wake_early.html


Stuart Don Levy

Morning Poem From Janice and Mom

Stuart Don Levy

‘The Hoarder in You’ - A Book That Can Help Cut Through the Clutter - NYTimes.com

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/22/health/the-hoarder-in-you-a-book-that-can-help-cut-through-the-clutter.html?src=me&ref=general&_r=0


Sent From Stuart

The Quiet Ones - NYTimes.com

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/11/18/opinion/sunday/the-quiet-ones.html?pagewanted=all


Sent From Stuart

Re: America's threat

Thanks, Doug.

I watched the video trailer "America's Threat."

The United States of America is going through a period of change.

Our demographic is changing.

The first image on this video clip is of Ronald Reagan.  But as I watched the video I thought of President Lincoln and his Gettysburg Address which closes with...

"that the nation, shall have a new birth of freedom, and that government of the people by the people for the people, shall not perish from the earth."

What Lincoln referred to as "people" included former slaves which at the time must have been so unsettling to the white majority.  

We have a large number of recent immigrants, many are a burden but many are the hardest working, happy to have a chance to make it here.  I can't help but bring up Patrick and Cibo Kangwa.  Many of the immigrants do work for lower pay than the so called "entitled" Americans would accept.  Without their help our cost of living would be much higher than it is.

I don't think that there is a Communist conspiracy against the United States of America.  I do believe that there is a conflict between the haves and the have nots in this country.  This is nothing new.  President Franklin Roosevelt, who in spite of being born into the upper economic class, saved the country from upheaval during the depression with the advice of his wise wife.

If there is a threat against the United States of America I would find it in the power of money and its influence over the American institutions.  Examples being the Supreme Court Ruling in the Citizens United Case allowing unlimited campaign donations by corporations to influence elections and former Congressmen being allowed to become lobbyists.

I don't think that religion is a threat except that it can be used as a trigger word to make people hysterical.  I  personally think that all reference to race religion and ethnicity should be removed from all tax forms, government forms, voter registration forms.  One person equals one vote.  And  even if you cared what a person's race/religion/ethnicity is, how would you classify the half breeds, the quarter breeds, the eight breeds, the sixteenth breeds etc.  (Hitler had this problem with the Jews.)

As I told you, I voted for Obama in 2008.  He is an amazing orator and he can be inspiring.  However, he failed to make the banks pay for their transgressions and did not have the balls to fire his Treasury Secretary when he was insubordinate and failed to take down Citicorp.  For that reason I voted for Romney.  I felt that he had the confidence as an administrator to do what needs to be done with our economic difficulties.  Now that Obama has been re-elected I hope that he chooses a good lieutenant who can set us on the right path to fiscal responsibility.

If you read all of this you do not have to read Al Gore's "Inconvenient Truth"  or watch his academy award winning documentary.

I enjoyed playing tennis with you today, you played well and we beat some very experienced players.   

 I wished that I had learned about the ride to Key West in time to invite you to join me.        

Sent From Stuart

On Nov 13, 2012, at 7:47 PM, Douglas Newland <dr1doug@gmail.com> wrote:

Sorry, this gets a bit religious, but the overall idea of what's happening is convincing. Send me a link to Al Gore's book and we'll compare notes. I thought we had some good victories today. Thanks for including me in the Red D tennis. See you tomorrow night. Doug

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SH8LkIqu1c8

Recipe for Salmon "Bulgogi" with Bok Choy and Mushrooms from Epicurious.com

This Epicurious.com recipe: Salmon "Bulgogi" with Bok Choy and Mushrooms

has been sent to you by a friend.

You can view the complete recipe online at: http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Salmon-Bulgogi-with-Bok-Choy-and-Mushrooms-242481?mbid=ipapp

Salmon "Bulgogi" with Bok Choy and Mushrooms
2 large garlic cloves, peeled, divided
1/3 cup chopped green onions
1/4 cup soy sauce
1 tablespoon Chinese rice wine or dry Sherry
1 3/4-inch cube peeled fresh ginger
2 teaspoons sugar
1 teaspoon Asian sesame oil
3/4 teaspoon chili-garlic sauce*
4 6-ounce center-cut skinless salmon fillets
1 tablespoon olive oil
1 large bok choy, cut crosswise into 1/2-inch-wide strips (about 7 cups)
4 ounces fresh shiitake mushrooms, stemmed, caps sliced

* Available in the Asian foods section of many supermarkets and at Asian markets.

Blend 1 garlic clove and next 7 ingredients in mini processor. Arrange salmon in 11x7x2-inch glass baking dish. Spoon marinade over. Let marinate 5 minutes.
Preheat oven to 500°F. Arrange fish, with some marinade still clinging, on rimmed baking sheet. Transfer any marinade in dish to small saucepan. Roast fish until just opaque in center, about 8 minutes. Bring marinade in saucepan to boil; set aside and reserve for glaze.
Meanwhile, heat oil in large nonstick skillet over high heat. Add bok choy and mushrooms; using garlic press, press in 1 garlic clove. Stir-fry until mushrooms are tender and bok choy is wilted, about 4 minutes. Season with salt and pepper.
Divide vegetables among plates. Top with salmon. Brush fish with glaze.



Bon Appétit
June 2008
by Rozanne Gold

Want to see how other cooks rated and reviewed this recipe? Go to http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Salmon-Bulgogi-with-Bok-Choy-and-Mushrooms-242481?mbid=ipapp

Sent From Stuart

Rooftops overlooking Aix en Provence, France

Hotel outside of Avignon, France

Jason at Addepar

http://a3.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/177031_903842445379_1170450136_o.jpg


Sent From Stuart

Chicken, Shiitake and Bok Choy Soup Recipe at Epicurious.com

http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Chicken-Shiitake-and-Bok-Choy-Soup-103106


Sent From Stuart

Nos Ancestres Les Gauloises, Paris, France - Restaurants - VirtualTourist

This is the restaurant that my sister, brother in law, aunt and uncle say we have to dine in. Unlike the hotel restaurant we dined in the last two nights, this one won't throw us out for being rowdy.

http://www.virtualtourist.com/travel/Europe/France/Ile_de_France/Paris-99080/Restaurants-Paris-Nos_Ancestres_Les_Gauloises-BR-1.html


Sent From Stuart

Fwd: Hi

Sent From Stuart

Begin forwarded message:

From: Danielle Levy <danimlevy@gmail.com>
Date: June 17, 2012 3:27:18 PM GMT+02:00
To: Sandy Levy <sandylevy5@gmail.com>, bigstu52@gmail.com
Subject: Re: Hi

All my life I've been surrounded by love from my family. I've had nothing but positive relationships as my role models. I want nothing more than to have what the two of you have found in each other. I started dating Tim, and fell head over heels for him. I've never felt this way before. I thought this was it...the real deal. He takes my breath away, and I felt I did the same for him. I think for a time I probably did. I can't help but be a hopeless romantic. This will take some time to heal from.

It definitely isn't easy. I'm in st. Pete now because Elaine was here visiting. We had a nice time together. Last night I saw Tim at the birthday party. Things got pretty emotional. We talked for a while. He had only wonderful things to say about me. He said it doesn't have anything to do with his ex-girlfriend, but that he doesn't know why he doesn't feel the chemistry with me that he used to. When I inquired about sexual chemistry he said he wasn't that. It was hard to hear that and to see how emotional he was. I can only try to give him the space that he needs.

Aunt Janice thinks it's possible he is afraid of commitment..that in the past he stayed in relationships because he knew they weren't going to work out. Now he meets me and sees it could work out and is scared of the commitment.

Who knows what it really is? It will take some time to heal from this. I hope you both are having a wonderful time. I miss you guys. Wishing I was spending Father's Day together. I love you and happy Father's Day Dad...you are a one and only. Josh and I are very blessed to call you our Dad :-)

Love,
Danielle

Sent from my iPhone

On Jun 15, 2012, at 5:14 PM, Sandy Levy <sandylevy5@gmail.com> wrote:

Hi honey,

I know this is not a great time for you but realize you are a great person and good things will happen.  Stay focus on yourself and your career and god will place someone in your path when you least expect it.  

Think of good things and times you have had and stay with those feelings . it will make you feel grateful for what you have had and have.  I only wish I was there to hug and kiss you.  Keep busy and maybe call grandma Levy and have lunch or dinner.  

Big hugs and kiss  from both of us.

Xxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxxoxooxoxoxoxooxoxoxo

Sent from my iPad  

Sandy

Father's Day

Dear Danielle,

I am sorry that you are in so much pain. I am happy that you could talk to Janice. Isn't she just wonderful! Just remember no matter what like I have Janice you will have Joshua.

Remember that when it comes to having a partner for life you want one that has no doubts about commitment. Read the last sentence ten times. You want to have someone who looks at you and adores you. You want to have someone who will say that you make him happy. When I met your Mom she looked at me like I could walk on water. We knew what we wanted to do together and you and Joshua are the result.

You are vulnerable because you are the product of several generations of very stable relationships. Most men are complete fuck ups and many women have a tendency to be attracted to such fuck ups. When it comes to picking a man I suggest that you talk to your mother, your aunt Janice, your grandma Marilyn, your aunt Cynthia and Roberta Kushner. Collectively they had close to 200 years of marriage under their belts. After that, speak to Grandma Dorothy about her war stories.

You are a beautiful, attractive, intelligent and productive young lady. Your identity is not determined by this man. Do not feel that because one man can not commit to you that you are diminished in any way.

It is so important for you to know what you want in life. Is it children? Is it money? Is it security? Is it sex? Is it affection? Get clear and go after it. If Tim or anyone else is not part of your program flush him down the toilet, as Papa would say. He is not the only fish in the sea.

Just take care of yourself and turn this event into a positive. You are going to come out of this stronger than ever.

You make this father proud.


Love,
Dad

On Jun 17, 2012, at 3:27 PM, Danielle Levy <danimlevy@gmail.com> wrote:

> All my life I've been surrounded by love from my family. I've had nothing but positive relationships as my role models. I want nothing more than to have what the two of you have found in each other. I started dating Tim, and fell head over heels for him. I've never felt this way before. I thought this was it...the real deal. He takes my breath away, and I felt I did the same for him. I think for a time I probably did. I can't help but be a hopeless romantic. This will take some time to heal from.
>
> It definitely isn't easy. I'm in st. Pete now because Elaine was here visiting. We had a nice time together. Last night I saw Tim at the birthday party. Things got pretty emotional. We talked for a while. He had only wonderful things to say about me. He said it doesn't have anything to do with his ex-girlfriend, but that he doesn't know why he doesn't feel the chemistry with me that he used to. When I inquired about sexual chemistry he said he wasn't that. It was hard to hear that and to see how emotional he was. I can only try to give him the space that he needs.
>
> Aunt Janice thinks it's possible he is afraid of commitment..that in the past he stayed in relationships because he knew they weren't going to work out. Now he meets me and sees it could work out and is scared of the commitment.
>
> Who knows what it really is? It will take some time to heal from this. I hope you both are having a wonderful time. I miss you guys. Wishing I was spending Father's Day together. I love you and happy Father's Day Dad...you are a one and only. Josh and I are very blessed to call you our Dad :-)
>
> Love,
> Danielle
>
> Sent from my iPhone
>
> On Jun 15, 2012, at 5:14 PM, Sandy Levy <sandylevy5@gmail.com> wrote:
>
>> Hi honey,
>> I know this is not a great time for you but realize you are a great person and good things will happen. Stay focus on yourself and your career and god will place someone in your path when you least expect it.
>> Think of good things and times you have had and stay with those feelings . it will make you feel grateful for what you have had and have. I only wish I was there to hug and kiss you. Keep busy and maybe call grandma Levy and have lunch or dinner.
>>
>> Big hugs and kiss from both of us.
>>
>> Xxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxxoxooxoxoxoxooxoxoxo
>>
>> Sent from my iPad
>>
>> Sandy

Aux en Provence, France

Aux en Provence, France

The view from our hotel room.

Aux en Provence

We made it to France and drove from Marseille to Aux en Province where we will spend the night before starting our bike ride.

Sautern Sky

This was the scene on Sunday night June 10 before we left for France. Joshua and Amanda came over for dinner. The day before we celebrated Father's Day in advance because Sandy and I will be away in France for a couple weeks. Danielle and Tim purchased me a new mailbox for Father's Day. We dined at the bubble room which is not as good as we had remembered it being. Tim and Danielle drove to the restaurant separately. Tim got a ticket on the return. I finally got the courage to tell mom that we are going to France for a couple weeks on a bike trip.

Sandy purchased new luggage for this upcoming trip. She has a green duffel bag hey orange duffel bag and a green knapsack.

We are going to visit Rachel and Kevin in Tampa before we get on the plane to fly to France. There will barely be enough room in the car to accommodate Jeff Roberta Stuart and Sandy along with all the baggage.

Two weeks ago I got the car detailed and it looks almost as good as new.

Good Times With Janice and Ted

Sunset over Lake Michigan

Farm House at Empire Michigan

Peter and Bailey

Sand cliffs over Lake Michigan

I want another puppy

Baby Puppy at Empire Michigan

Getting the Artist's Signature on her prints.

Empire Michigan

Sunset at Empire Michigan

Happy Times at the Bubble Room

Waiting Outside the Bubble Room

Bailey on one of her four beds

Father's Day at the Bubble Room 2012

The restaurant may be going downhill but the patrons are better than ever

Father's Day Celebration at the Bubble Room

This post shows the map of the Tour de Cashiers 100 mile race.

Alaska Glacier

Sunset From the Crystal Bow in Alaska

Small Boat to Alaska

Cruising to Alaska

Lions Gate Bridge Vancouver, Canada

Vancouver, Canada

Bouchard Gardens Vivid Colors

Bouchard Gardens Pink Flower

Bouchard Gardens Macro Flower

Bouchard Gardens Victoria, Canada

Fun Times With Abby

Living It Up On The Crystal Cruise to Alaska

Looking Back On San Francisco

Mount Lassen, California

Hot Springs Near Mount Lassen

Lighthouse Beach Sanibel Florida

Sanibel Causeway

Together

Together
Valentine's Day 2012

Their paths crossed
and
then ran together.
With her bright eyes
And
her easy smile
Came their happiness.
Her marvelous magnetic curves
created an irresistable pull
and
a powerful push.
Their mountain climbs
And
their rhythmic embraces
made their paths run
and
their streams flow together.

Her white sequened gown
and
his shoe crushed glass
cemented
their unbridled romance

Years later
their children grown and
their fortress built
The always-bright eyes now wizened
and
the easy smile now confident
and
the marvelous curves just as magnetic
still make the irristable pull
and
the powerful push.
Smaller mountains are climbed
and
Embraces are at a slower rhythm

But Their paths still run
and
Their streams still flow
together.






Stuart

Mother's Day May 13,2012

Mother's Day May 13,2012

It is a special day in a special weekend.
The sun is shining.
The air is fresh.
The blankets are on the green grass
Two lawn chairs lay next to the blankets.
A brown box and chiseled stone lay side beside
Seventeen quiet family converge on the plot marked for ten
Words are spoken
Memories are exchanged
Wounds are healed
Tears are shed
Laughter is shared
Hands are held
Hugs are given in groups of two three and four
Birds are chirping and being chased by black poodle




Stuart

The Criminalization of Bad Mothers - NYTimes.com

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/29/magazine/the-criminalization-of-bad-mothers.html


Sent from my iPhone

Fwd: You Guys Moving Back In With Us

Stuart 

Begin forwarded message:

From: "bigstu52@gmail.com" <bigstu52@gmail.com>
Date: March 7, 2012 7:06:26 AM EST
To: Joshua Scott Levy <levy.joshua@ymail.com>, Amanda Karch <amandakarch@gmail.com>, Sandy Levy <sandylevy5@gmail.com>
Subject: You Guys Moving Back In With Us

Your Mom and I are glad that you feel comfortable enough with us to want to move back home.
You know that we will be always ready to help you in case of emergency.  I appreciate your offer to do the yard work and I know that you would do an excellent job at it.  (Thank-you for planting the orange tree.)  I also understand your desire to save money.


On the other hand you must understand that your Mom and I are looking forward to getting our privacy back when Danielle gets her own place and while we love you to visit there is something special about being home alone with your spouse.  You newlyweds need your privacy also.  It is worth the expense.


Love,

Dad

Fwd: Dad's Celebaration of Life

Stuart 

Begin forwarded message:

From: "bigstu52@gmail.com" <bigstu52@gmail.com>
Date: March 2, 2012 6:44:26 AM EST
To: "mirra7@comcast.net" <mirra7@comcast.net>
Cc: Jason Mirra <mirraj2@gmail.com>, Joshua Scott Levy <levy.joshua@ymail.com>, Danielle Levy <danimlevy@gmail.com>, Sandy Levy <sandylevy5@gmail.com>
Subject: Re: Dad's Celebaration of Life

Based on feedback from my e-mail two days ago.  I propose the weekend of Friday, May 11 to Sunday, May 13 which includes Mother's day.  Having us together for that special weeking will be great for Mom/Grandma.  So if possible try to book the flights out so that you can give her a hug and a kiss that morning before you fly out.  (She, like me, rarely gets up after sunrise, so that should not be too difficult.)

Janice, you decide who sleeps where.  You know your new place.  Sandy, Bailey and I should be together in one room.  Bailey is happy as long as she can be with Sandy and visa versa.

I would like to have a private ceremony at the gravesite where Jeff is burried.  Janice, please call the cemetery people and give them a date and a time and a request that someone be present to dig a hole in the appropriate spot next to Jeff.   We can each take turns pouring the ashes and when we are finished a cemetery attendant can cover the hole with dirt and grass.  

My feeling is that everyone will be sad but lightened and happy that we will be able to express how much Dad meant to us.  Each person present should have an opportunity to express his or her feelings in their own way.  A few words, a short speech, a poem, or a song, or whatever.

My hope is that this experience will bring us together and if I am right, we should consider returning in a year's time to place a tombstone at the site where the ashes are burried.  (Dad always liked us planning to be together.)  

I know that Dad/Papa would like Jake to be present.  We can't undo the past but Dad would be happy if he knew that in some way he could assist in healing wounds.

Please confirm that the dates are OK and we will let you make the air reservations. Send me receipts and we will reimburse you from Dad's trust.

If it is OK with you, Janice, I would like to call Cynthia and Don if you would call Helen, Roberta and Karl.

I love you all!

Stuart/Dad

Stuart/Dad 

On Mar 1, 2012, at 7:13 PM, mirra7@comcast.net wrote:

The only date that Jason ruled out was May 5th.  Any input from Danielle yet?  Can't wait to see you guys.  How is Bailey doing?  

xox

Janice

Together

Together
Valentine's Day 2012

Their paths crossed
and
then ran together.
With her bright eyes
And
her easy smile
Came their happiness.
Her marvelous magnetic curves
created an irresistable pull
and
a powerful push.
Their mountain climbs
And
their rhythmic embraces
made their paths run
and
their streams flow together.

Her white sequened gown
and
his shoe crushed glass
cemented
their unbridled romance

Years later
their children grown and
their fortress built
The always-bright eyes now wizened
and
the easy smile now confident
and
the marvelous curves just as magnetic
still make the irristable pull
and
the powerful push.
Smaller mountains are climbed
and
Embraces are at a slower rhythm

But Their paths still run
and
Their streams still flow
together.

Stuart

Re: Joe Kushner,

stu- you're a good friend and your thoughts are on target. hope u guys are having fun. don't wear yourselves out and save something for france. give sandy a smootch for me jeff

Sent from my iPad

On Feb 7, 2012, at 2:48 PM, "Drslevy@comcast.net" <drslevy@comcast.net> wrote:

> Joe Kushner,
>
> Jeff sent me an email informing us of his father Joe's passing.
> Joe will be remembered by me as a man who could enjoy life right up into his nineties. He had a lot to live for: A great family who adored him and looked up to him and Micki, a wonderful companion for decades who provided Joe with a database when memories slipped away. Joe cared for Micki and that gave him some purpose in the later years.
> What better evidence is there of a great man than the affectionate children that he raises and leaves behind. Joe's sense of humor and love of family lives on through them and their children.
> Being a close friend, I had the privilege of witnessing Joe and the Kushner offspring. Sandy and I were fortunate to participate in some of their regular family celebrations. Joe would bring the violin out and play with the grandkids or accompany me and my nephews on the piano. He chided me for not playing enough and he was right to do so. Music for Joe was a source of strength and I believe that playing his violin gave him a purpose that allowed him to live well into his tenth decade.
> I will never forget chauffeuring Joe and Micki back to Sarasota on my way to visit my Mom. Jeanie tucked them into the back seat of my Lexus and Joe referred to me as "Boy." Then he asked me what I did with my chauffeur's cap. I told him that I would be sure to get one for our next trip back to Sarasota together. I am sad that I won't be able to drive Joe back to Sarasota again. Instead I will have to settle with driving the offspring to Miami, Melbourne and Tampa.
>
> We were in Sydney, Australia, newly arrived with jet lag and walking through the Botanical Garden next to the Sydney Harbor Bridge and Opera House when Jeff sent me his email about Joe. This photo, of a prickly cactus plant surrounded by a lovely red flower symbolizes my memory of Joe. He was a beautiful man but if you did not approach him in the proper manner you might get pricked.
>
>
> <image.jpeg>
>
>
>
> Stuart

Joe Kushner,

Joe Kushner,

Jeff sent me an email informing us of his father Joe's passing.
Joe will be remembered by me as a man who could enjoy life right up into his nineties. He had a lot to live for: A great family who adored him and looked up to him and Micki, a wonderful companion for decades who provided Joe with a database when memories slipped away. Joe cared for Micki and that gave him some purpose in the later years.
What better evidence is there of a great man than the affectionate children that he raises and leaves behind. Joe's sense of humor and love of family lives on through them and their children.
Being a close friend, I had the privilege of witnessing Joe and the Kushner offspring. Sandy and I were fortunate to participate in some of their regular family celebrations. Joe would bring the violin out and play with the grandkids or accompany me and my nephews on the piano. He chided me for not playing enough and he was right to do so. Music for Joe was a source of strength and I believe that playing his violin gave him a purpose that allowed him to live well into his tenth decade.
I will never forget chauffeuring Joe and Micki back to Sarasota on my way to visit my Mom. Jeanie tucked them into the back seat of my Lexus and Joe referred to me as "Boy." Then he asked me what I did with my chauffeur's cap. I told him that I would be sure to get one for our next trip back to Sarasota together. I am sad that I won't be able to drive Joe back to Sarasota again. Instead I will have to settle with driving the offspring to Miami, Melbourne and Tampa.

We were in Sydney, Australia, newly arrived with jet lag and walking through the Botanical Garden next to the Sydney Harbor Bridge and Opera House when Jeff sent me his email about Joe. This photo, of a prickly cactus plant surrounded by a lovely red flower symbolizes my memory of Joe. He was a beautiful man but if you did not approach him in the proper manner you might get pricked.

Gingrich Wins The South Carolina Presidential Primary

Gingrich Winning the South Carolina Presidential Primary

That a so called conservative state could vote for a representative that was found guilty in an ethics scandal while serving as speaker of the House of Respresentatives just goes to show how fickle an electorate can be. The man spent 8 years vilifying President Clinton for infidelity while engaging in the same sordid affairs with younger female associates. How can one forget how the federal government was paralyzed by the republicans in the House of Representatives while they impeached the President in the 1990's. Gingrich now boasts of how well he worked with President Clinton in keeping the prosperity of the 1990's. It amazes me how short peoples memories are.

Stuart

Stuart 

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Stuart 

Janice about Dad

My experience of my dad, Dick Levy, for my first 16 years or so was that he was in control of the world.  Not just my world, but anyone's in his small circle: my mother, my brothers, the dogs,  the Lake Isle Shore club - And everything: from the hand clipped edges of the yard, the lawn, garden, compost, cars, house, finances.  I later came to understand his need for control stemming from the insecurity of his childhood.  He had never felt the sanctuary of a caring family and was determined his family would be secure.  I remember sitting at his kitchen table in Florida chatting when I was home from college and mentioning that when I was growing up, that I felt like our home was so much more solid than a house.  That it was like the rock of Gibraltar.  I remember his eyes tearing up - a first for me to see.  
My dad was very proud of his children.  And his love was conditional.  He made it clear that if his arm had cancer, he would cut it off.   I think all 3 of us struggled with balancing wanting to please him and wanting to make our own choices and live our lives our way.  But one thing I am certain about: no one ever had a parent who cared more.  I have dozens of letters that my dad wrote to Ted and me covering topics from the trivial to the profound.  And until the last dozen years, his counsel was spot on.  He was very sharp and expert in finding the hole in anything.  I was incredibly lucky to have been so loved and cared about by someone so smart and willing to guide.
Beyond providing a secure home and family life and freely giving sound guidance, probably my dad's greatest gifts he bestowed on his family were the annual family vacations he took us on beginning 21 years ago.    Those vacations were the highlight of our year.  They provided an opportunity for family bonding like nothing I've observed in other families.  Several close knit families I know, having heard about my dad's execution of these excursions, have organized similar gatherings for their families.  Imitation is the greatest form of flattery.  But my dad couldn't care less what anyone else thought.  He took us on these trips to develop connections within the family.  Ask any of his grandchildren and I feel certain they would tell you those trips provided some of their fondest memories of their childhoods.  They are the reason Stu's and my children feel close to their cousins.  And these vacations strengthened the bonds between Stu, Ted, Sandy and myself.  After each trip my dad would state - they can't take that one away.  Having a trip behind us for him was like money in the bank.
My dad held his wife, Marilyn, on a pedestal.  She was his princess and I believe they both truly had exactly the marriage they wanted.  My mother was very happy to let my dad control her world and my dad was perfectly happy with his princess.  Which gets me to the biggest lesson I learned from my dad:  know what you want and don't care what anyone else thinks - except maybe him ;)
These last years as his illness robbed him of everything that was him, I tried to imagine a lesson in this sadness.  What could possibly be the purpose of such suffering.  My life has not been devoid of sadness but I have found I can usually learn something from whatever life hands me.  I have thought it is a terrible irony that someone who prized control would in the end lose control of everything in his life.  My mother-in-law, whose medical specialty is alzheimers disease, rightly said that my dad's personality was the worst for having this illness.    He was not one to abdicate control which made his care in the last years very difficult.  I will be forever grateful to Sandy and Stuart for taking on the monumental effort of caring for our dad and making sure he knew he was loved right up to his last breath.  
I am grateful to have had a present, supportive, caring father.  I am grateful for the family that he envisioned and created.  When I consider the handicap of the circumstances of my dad's early years, I am inspired by his ability to define, seek and achieve success in his life.  
 
 
 

Memories of Dad

Memories of Dad
Warren Dick Levy 11-5-28 to 1-5-12

My father was born just prior to the start of the Great Depression. His mother was a beauty named Mildred Wilke and his natural father was a man whose last name was Warhurst. His parents separated when Dad was an infant and when the depression hit hard Mildred could not handle the strain of being a single mother. Dad was put temporarily in a foster home and then was bounced around among Mildred's relative's. He had a very insecure childhood. He was a wild youth with little supervision.

Eventually Mildred remarried Joseph Levy who with his brother and father ran a successful meat packing business named Plymouth Rock with plants in the Bronx and Manhatten. Dad lived with Mildred and Joe. Roberta, his half sister was born when Dad was about ten years old. Joseph was concerned about adopting Dad and it wasn't until Dad was past twenty years of age when adoption papers were formally filed.

Dad spent a year at Cobleskill Agricultural College and also took some business courses at Pace College in New York. When Dad was in his early twenties Joseph stepped up and offered Dad a job at Plymouth Rock. Dad prided himself in doing every job that the meat packing plant had to offer. Whatever he did from cleaning floors to selling product he perfected. Joseph and his brother, Lester recognized Dad's industriousness and wisely promoted Dad to plant manager.

Dad met his wife Marilyn and on their first date told her that he was going to marry her. By the time Dad was 23 years old I was born. Dad worked 16 hour days at Plymouth Rock and was largely responsible for the business's success, expansion and then subsequent sale to the larger company, Food Corporation of America. Upon the sale of the company Lester Levy wanted to reward Dad with a small percentage of the proceeds. Joseph objected leaving Dad to the mercy of the board of directors of the purchasing company. Fortunately the new owner recognized Dad's talent for reining in expenses and expanding sales and production. Dad was given a title of President and a raise. He still worked 14 hour days and banked almost all of what he earned. My brother Jeffrey and Sister Janice were born three and ten years behind me. Dad was totally focused on creating a stable environment that he was denied as a child.

By the time the children were 13, 10 and 3 years old Dad was weary of the meatpacking business. Joseph and Mildred Levy owned 212 acres of property in rural Duchess County New York and they offered Dad the opportunity to farm the land and build a small house on the property. The house was halfway built when the chairman of Food Corporation of America made Dad an offer of increased salary with a secure contract. Dad stopped work on the farmhouse and we moved to a home on a Lakefront community about 12 miles north of the New York City line. The house was a modest three bedroom ranch to which Dad added a pool room, greenhouse and workshop. It bordered on a cemetery which made the property more affordable. Dad also used sub-contractors from the meat packing plant to do much of the labor on the remodel. Because the house was near a lake the basement required a sump pump to prevent flooding. The pump had a backup and it was often my responsibility to make sure that it was working when he was not around.

To say Dad was a tough father would be a gross understatement. His authority in the house was unquestioned. He ruled the children with his belt. I, being the oldest was the most responsible. Jeffrey and Janice were on the receiving end of some spankings, but I was on the front line. At a very young age of eight I was pictured holding onto my younger brother Jeff as we walked home from school. At ten years old I was babysitting my infant sister and changing her diapers. It was the threat of a "licking" and the desire for his approval that made me responsible. Spankings continued right up until I reached 20 years of age. Each spanking up until the last one was followed by a make up embrace and an explanation. If I turned out to be a "loser" it would not be because of lack of discipline on his part. He was determined to give us what he did not receive as a child. His dominance was at times pathologic. Mealtimes were battlegrounds when Dad became impatient with the pace that we consumed what was on our plates. He would give us time limits to finish our meal. the threat would be that the strap would come out if we didn't clean our plate by the time the big hand on the clock reached the 12.

Dad retired from Plymouth Rock when he was 40 years of age. Imagine having a tyrannical father at home when you are in high school. My chores included shoveling snow, walking the dogs, washing the cars before the sun rose on Saturday morning lest there be water spots on the clean car, mowing the acre lot behind our house, papering the garbage cans (those were the days before trash bags and heaven forbid that we had dirty garbage cans after the trash was collected.)

Dad knew his cost of living to the penny. He calculated how much he needed to retire on his investment income. He invested in ultra safe tax free bonds and became the master of compounded interest. From the time he retired until the time he passed away his net worth grew with little or no risk.

He was very proud of his children. He loved planning family vacations. He was a master gardener. The attendant at the cemetery behind our house would give Dad discarded potted plants from gravesites and Dad would nurse them back to health in his greenhouse. He would then sell the plants wholesale to a local florist who at first did not want to buy them. But when Dad began to sell the plants on the cheap right outside his front door he changed his mind. He grew every kind of vegetable in his garden and made a large compost pile. Christmas gifts that Dad collected from suppliers at work were in the form of cases of alcohol which he stockpiled in our attac above the workshop. We had a hundred cases of named brand booze that hauled up there. Years later he figured out a way to sell the gifted booze to the neighbors who at the time felt they were getting a great deal.

Dad moved from New York to Sarasota Florida in 1978. By that time all the children were grown except for my sister, Janice who was in college. He was proud that I was a physician preparing to practice in Florida and that my younger brother Jeffrey had completed his degree from the University of Pennsylvania in just two and a half years.

Dad's world was rocked by the violent death of my brother Jeffrey in 1985. I don't think that he ever recovered from the shock of this loss. Jeffrey was shot in a robbery while he was a manager at a Benigans in Wilmington, North Carolina. The culprit was never apprehended. Shortly after the murder Dad told me that he knew something more upsetting about the murder but he refused to share it with me.

Jeffrey's loss was somewhat softened by Janice's and my marriages and the birth of five grandchildren. The tide started to go out again when Janice's husband Ted was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. At around the same time Ted was being diagnosed and treated it became apparent that Dad's razor sharp mind was losing its edge. He began to make inappropriate comments and became increasingly difficult for my mother to tolerate. It is one thing to be authoritative and correct but you can't be authoritative and wrong.

In 2007 I retired from my medical practice and made myself available to my parents who were in an increasingly unstable situation. I live 80 miles south in Fort Myers and began to make weekly drives to Sarasota with our Wheaton Terrier "Einstein." Dad Einstein and I would frolic on the golf course behind the condo. Then he would dine on hot dogs and scotch whiskey in a restaurant that allowed dogs.

In the spring of 2008 Mom told me that she did not know how much longer she could deal with Dad. She was having difficulty assuming all of the responsibilities that Dad always carried. She wanted to move into an assisted living facility where all her needs would be met. I went up to Sarasota and toured several facilities with Mom and made a deposit to reserve a two bedroom unit at a suitable facility. Dad was verbally abusive to Mom. He was furious at me for intervening in their affairs. Mom was constantly pressured by Dad's declining mental status. Mom eventually had a fainting spell on the tennis court and was cared for by the emergency medical service. Her friends convinced her that she was under too much pressure. My wife, Sandy and I successfully intervened to sell Dad's car after he caused two accidents. We were trying with the help of my sister, Janice to arrange for a companion or nurse to sit with Dad during the day and spell Mom for a couple of hours. In the intirum we actually hired our son Joshua to sit with Dad. Dad did not recognize his grandson. He asked why my mother brought the strange man into the house. Mom could not take it any more. She called me and told me that she was moving out of their house, and that it was time that her children should "step up and take care of their father."

Sandy and I drove up to Sarasota and met Joshua and Dad at the condo. We took him out to dinner like we always did when we came up to visit. After dinner we drove him down to Fort Myers. We turned on some Sinatra music and childproof locked the back of my Lexus. He said, "This is a new way back home isn't it, son?" When we pulled into our Wiskey Creek subdivision he recognized that he wasn't going home but was going to our house. Sandy and I had the intention of keeping him with us. The next day my sister Janice flew down from Pittsburgh to help Dad transition. This initially helped by giving the crisis the appearance of a family get together. The calm was short lived however, and Dad soon started asking about Mom. We called Mom who spoke to Dad on the phone and told Dad that she could not live with him any longer. When he got off the phone with Mom he accused me of butting into his business and that I should take him back to his home and Mom. We told him that we could not take him back because Mom would not stay with him and we could not leave him alone. He then insisted that we call Mom back and talk to her. We then recorded her voice on a tape recorder stating categorically that she could no longer live with him. We played the tape back periodically to Dad when he insisted that he speak to Mom. We arranged for Dad to meet Dr. Newland, who is a close friend and a neurologist. We arranged to meet with home nursing people to help us manage. We spoke to friends and professionals about home care for a family member with dementia. After a few days in our home Dad said to me, "You are a doctor, son. You have the medications. Put me out of my misery." At that point it became clear to myself, Sandy and Janice that there was no way that we would be able to care for Dad at home. We have a lake with alligators behind the house and knives in the kitchen. We felt as if we were sitting on top of a powder keg. We called Dr. Newland and arranged for Dad to be cared for in a locked facility where he would not be in danger to himself. We called his attorney who recommended that we get him to sign forms giving Janice, Mom and I power of attorney.

I will never forget sitting in Dr. Newland's office holding Janice while we waited to see the doctor. The doctor told Dad that he was exercising his responsibility to protect Dad from himself when he committed Dad to a psychiatric unit. It was not Janice's decision or Stuart's decision but
Dr. Newland's responsibility as a physician. Dad told Dr. Newland that he was fired. Dr. Newland respectfully told Dad that he could not fire him. Dad then looked at me and handed me his wallet and keys. The emergency medical technicians then came in with a stretcher and transported Dad to a lock- down psychiatric unit in Punta Gorda thirty mile north of Fort Myers.

Dad stayed in the unit under fairly heavy sedation for two weeks. I was the only one allowed to visit him. Sandy and Janice began to make inquiries about skilled nursing units for people with dementia.

Sandy and I were waiting for Dad when the medical transport took him to Arden Courts of Fort Myers. We watched him get out of the front seat of the transport and help the driver with his bags. He then walked into the unit where we were waiting. For the last three years of his life he never left the grounds of this facility. The unit was "dementia-proof." We felt that he was safe there and it was in some ways a relief to Dad that he did not have to worry about answering any questions. We could come and visit at any time and a nurse would be present at all times. l cooked soups for Dad and kept him stocked with beer and wine. When he first entered the unit he was the Bingo champion playing two or three cards at a time.

Dad's decline had a profound effect on his grandchildren who always looked up to him. Seeing him institutionalized and minimalized shook their world order.

The last few months were very difficult. Dad lost his ability to speak and eventually could not recognize us. He would walk around the unit and frequently fall and bang his head and face. I would meet him on the nursing unit and sometimes in the ER. Fortunately, I could usually intervene to avoid aggressive medical interventions.

Dad always had a good appetite. He loved ice cream and with nutritional milkshakes the aides at Arden Court kept him going for a long time. Finally he stopped eating and drinking. Hope Hospice was called to keep him comfortable.

It was painful for me to see Dad in his terminal state. Yesterday Sandy called to tell me that she would not leave Dad because she wanted to be with him at the end. I brought her a salad that I had made for her. I went into Dad's room and saw her leaning over Dad and comforting him. Bailey, our poodle was in the room getting restless. Bailey started to pace in the room and Sandy got up to take her outside. The nurse, Kathy came in to give Dad his morphine and shortly after she squirted it against his cheek Dad gave a gasp and stopped breathing.

Stuart